Family Media Archives - islandparent

Papa’s Privacy Policy

Bud Ridout — Thu, 04 Jun 2020 16:59:00 +0000

Doesn’t have to be “Papa’s,” of course. Please replace that with whichever guardianship title suits you. I just like alliteration.

Also, I’m not a lawyer. I don’t even play one on the radio. So this ain’t legal advice (I threw in the “ain’t” there to solidify my point); it’s a balance of Googling and Papa paranoia.

There are many points of privacy we don’t have much control over without encasing our littles in bubble wrap or traveling with an entourage of tall, sunglasses-wearing security to fend off the paparazzi.

For instance, in Canada, it is legal for anyone to take a photo of you, or your kids, without your permission, if you’re out in public, or otherwise viewable from a public vantage point (if they’re not on private property), where you have no reasonable expectation of privacy.

It gets detail-y and law-y when it comes to commercial use, so I’m not venturing into that swamp.

What I am here to talk about is the protection of our kids’ personal privacy which we, as parents, have control over.

Everybody loves a baby photo or 20. It’s great to see children grow up through Facebook albums or Instagram accounts created to document their upbringing, but at some point, it’ll be time to think about the kid’s own autonomy, and what they might want when it comes to their image online.

The fact is, we all cultivate our online personas, whether a little or a lot. For digital natives growing into their own, having a backlog of images and milestones documented on a parent’s social media account and associated with their name might not be the coolest thing, dude.

I don’t know if the kids still say “dude.”

So, here are some ideas from Paranoid Papa Bud to balance showing your pride and joy off to the world…against them docking your coolness points later in life because of that photo of their naked butt in the bathtub when they were six.

Put yourself in their shoes. Many of us should be considered very lucky that our younger-days antics weren’t captured frame-by-frame for the entire world to see. Curate what you post, both for your audience (cull that series of face-in-birthday-cake shots down to one, rather than posting four similar ones) and your kids’ future rep.

I also don’t know if the kids are still concerned with their “rep.” I’m sure they are, but perhaps it’s called something different in 2020, like “Klout.”

Consider a nickname, or just use their initials. Especially if your real first and last name is on your social media accounts, maybe you address your little by the first initial of their first name. Many folks go by their first and middle names. Or, perhaps, a (hopefully non-embarrassing) nickname. Heck, I gave my daughter both a nickname (Kit Kat) and a hashtag (#PapaKidlet). Anything to slow down the search engines.

Ask. As they become aware of the internet and its direct connection to them—have them Google themselves or, better yet, have them Google you—check with them before posting photos or video of them. As their parent/guardian, you’re the one most allowed to post their likeness online, but like many other aspects of your relationship, this is a matter of respect. Show them that courtesy by asking, respect their decisions, and keep the conversation open and normalized.

Keep track of your media. There’s lots of internet out there, and it can be easy to lose track of where photos or video of your child have been uploaded. But, if you’re careful to keep it to, say, a couple or three main places, it’ll be easier to go back and pull any down which they may later find mortifying and request you remove. You do have a password manager to keep track of all those different passwords, right?

Watch identifiers. Scrutinize content pre-posting for anything which may make it easier to figure out your child’s city/school/home address. I’ve seen plenty of albums which include both a photo of the kid in a school wear, and another in front of their home with a visible street number. Doesn’t take much Google-Fu from there to find that house.

Engage in disinformation. That nickname you may be using? Ask them to consider using one of their own. Those cutsey screen names we used to use may be cringe-worthy today (ROOTBEERPOUNDER69420@ICQ.COM), but they also made it tougher to find us online.

Of course, as parents/guardians, we should be a part of any forms your child fills out asking for their name, address, phone number, date of birth, etc. But, unless it’s vital that the information be accurate (e.g., something for a health agency, government, etc.), consider keeping it to just their initials, using your work address, using your mobile or 000-000-0000 as a phone number, shifting their date of birth by a month or six, etc. Just keep it consistent in case some recall of the information is needed as a security challenge later.

It’s all about small deterrents to make OSINT (Open Source INTelligence, or using publicly-available records to gather information) on your family that much more difficult. While these ideas may not stop the most determined goofball from Googling you and yours, it should add enough noise to the signal to discourage the majority of ’em.

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Love is not Enough

IslandParent — Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000

Duration: 4:10

Your Own Happiness is a Gift to Your Child

Parents may need to put their life goals on hold and look after their own emotional needs so that they can create an environment where their child is connected and secure. Babies are not blank slates but rather, born with tremendous potential for self-realization. Or self-negation. Parents may need to deal with their own stress and seek support as needed.

Attachment Patterns have a Multigenerational Aspect

When parents focus on the comfort, security and happiness of their young child, the child benefits and so do future generations. The human brain develops, not only according to genetics, but largely in response to input from the environment. In other words, a baby’s capacity for intimate relationships, connection, self-regulation, attention and stress regulation are directly shaped by the emotional availability of the parents. During the critical first three months the right conditions need to be met for healthy brain development. Babies need caregivers who are non-stressed, non-depressed, emotionally available and consistently available. Babies and toddlers need a safe and low-stress environment.

Featuring:

Dr. Gabor Maté

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Pregnancy and the Role of Fathers

IslandParent — Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000

Duration: 4:08

Pregnancy is a Time of Change for Fathers as well as Mothers

The birth of a baby significantly impacts fathers, changing how they view themselves with respect to their partner, their role in the family, their career, hobbies, and their financial responsibilities. Sleep patterns may be disrupted by a new baby which can be particularly difficult for shift workers.

Support for New Fathers can Include Engagement and Role Models

A large number of fathers come from families that were more traditional, and lack a role model suitable to the needs of the contemporary family. Allowing for more fathers to participate in prenatal classes and dad support groups are ways to ensure that new fathers are better able to understand their role.

Featuring:

Dr. Carolyn Steinberg

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See the World Through Your Baby’s Eyes

IslandParent — Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000

Duration: 2:55

New Babies are Learning to Deal with their Physiology

Coming into the world is a brand new experience for babies who have to learn to recognize the strange physical sensations they are experiencing for the first time. Babies can feel uncomfortable with these new physical sensations, and sometimes it’s hard for their digestive systems to work easily. They gain confidence through a positive relationship with caregivers.

Caregivers Learn to Respond to Baby’s Signals

Over the early weeks of life caregivers learn to respond to their baby. You may not know exactly what baby needs, but your efforts and tone of voice will provide reassurance that they can trust someone will be there to look after their needs.

Featuring:

Dr. Carolyn Steinberg

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How to Bathe a Baby: Comprehensive Trailer

IslandParent — Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000

Duration: 4:50

How to Make Bathtime a Safe, Fun and Nurturing Experience

Introducing a series of videos with valuable tips for bathing new babies. It’s an ideal time to connect with baby. Safe and effective techniques are demonstrated. Parents and professionals share their insights.

Emotional Value and Health Insights of Bathing Babies

Even babies who dislike baths at first will almost always learn to love this soothing, bonding, healthy experience within a few weeks or months.

Featuring:

Dr. Carolyn Steinberg, Dr. Stefanie Green, Dr. Andrew Macnab, Tammy Timms, Kim Millar Lewis

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Social & Emotional Intelligence of Infants

IslandParent — Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000

Duration: 3:20

Babies are Born Aware and Expecting a Relationship

Between babies and their parents, social and emotional intelligence and connection will grow through physical contact (such as skin-to-skin contact) and though speech and language.

The Trajectory for Good Development Involves Many Factors

The capacity to love is a reciprocal trust building between two people. Play with your baby, carry your baby, read to them, tell stories and you will be providing the pieces that are most likely to lead to a good outcome.

Featuring:

Dr. Nils Bergman

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How to Bathe a Baby: Safety First

IslandParent — Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000

Duration: 8:05

Be Prepared, Never Leave a Baby Alone, Check Water Temperature and Hold Baby Safely

There are four key considerations for bath time safety. Caregivers need to be organized in order to provide safe and comfortable bathing environments for babies. Never leave a baby alone. Check the water temperature. Hold baby safely. Keep baby warm during and after the bath.

You Don’t Need Special Devices for Baby’s Bath

If you do use a device to prop your baby, remember, it will not be foolproof. You must always keep a hand on your baby in the bath. Parents and professionals share their insights.

Featuring:

Dr. Andrew Macnab, Dr. Carolyn Steinberg, Dr. Stefanie Green, Kim Millar Lewis, Tammy Timms, Eva Bild

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The Joy and Miracle of Parenthood

IslandParent — Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000

Duration: 5:09

Young Parents Learn about Themselves During the Pregnancy, Birth and Early Years

Cultivating awareness from moment to moment is part of the miracle of parenthood. Parents are growing along with their baby and learning new things about nurturing relationships.

Early Connections Last Throughout Life

Babies are very much in the present moment and parents should recognize the power of the preciousness of the present moment. Parents should consider how other priorities can wait

Featuring:

Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn

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Born to Communicate: Babies are Born Ready to Learn

IslandParent — Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000

Duration: 10:25

Your Baby is Listening in the Womb

Babies are preparing to learn language even before they are born and are born aware of the rhythm of language. Your newborn can hear, even while sleeping. This means your baby is always learning. Babies are most able to learn when they feel comfortable, in a quiet alert state. Nurturing environments lead to optimal learning.

This video is the third chapter of a series called “Born to Communicate” and it discusses research techniques and findings. Key messages appear on-screen)

Research on How Babies Learn Language

Research shows how the infant brain functions during the first days and weeks after birth, particularly with respect to the responses to sights and sounds that will lead to language development.

Featuring:

Dr. Janet Werker, Lilian May, Alison Greuel

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Touch and Connection with Babies

IslandParent — Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000

Duration: 2:31

Physical Contact Benefits Baby and Mother

Baby massage, as traditionally done in some cultures, promotes brain development in the baby but also releases bonding hormones in the mother and triggers her mothering instincts. It makes the baby feel more secure and the mother more attentive. Touch is also part of the reason why breastfeeding is so important.

Comfort with our Bodies

Our society sees a fairly low rate of breastfeeding and an increase in the Caesarean sections. These signal a genuine discomfort of women with their own bodies. Returning to traditional practices of touch would fulfill a deep evolutionary purpose.

Featuring:

Dr. Gabor Maté

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